Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes

As you can tell if you’ve been reading my posts, I am in the middle of combining several blogs that I started. I will now be posting erotic book and toy reviews on my blog. I’m excited about becoming a sex toy reviewer ;). I will also be posting pieces that I’ve written or am currently working on. Most Importantly: I will be blogging about BDSM, Daddy/babygirl Relationships, Polyamory, and Getting Your Kink On When You Have a Disability.

I will also be starting a question and answer segment, so if there any questions about BDSM that you’ve been dying to ask since you read 50 Shades, then I’m your girl. I will caution you though, and say that bdsm in the real world isn’t “really” like 50 Shades. There are a ton of different relationships that fall under the BDSM umbrella, and then there are people who just like to get freaky every once in a blue moon.

I have Multiple Sclerosis, and seeing as how this is MS Awareness month I decided to checkout the resources available to us kinky disabled folks. Sadly, there wasn’t as many as I’d hoped & some that looked promising had simply died out. So, I feel like I need to take one for the team and be the “Official Disabled Sexy Toy Testing Goddess”. I will do my duty & serve my community proudly; I will face the day, one toy at a time ;).

I will also be discussing polyamory, because I have recently begun a poly relationship. If someone had asked me about being poly five years ago, I would have looked at them like they were crazy. I’ve changed a lot in that time. I’ve learned that it’s important to be loved unconditionally & be happy, for me that happens to be as a member of a triad…and Daddy’s babygirl. Image

Every sub is Allowed to Have a Temper Tantrum, Right?

Okay, if you are a Dom reading this you are probably thinking HELL NO…..actually, the funniest thing that happened after my  outburst & fit of self-doubt is that the Doms all said to breathe.  So maybe it’s not all that unsubmissive to question the depth of one’s submissiveness , lol.

But seriously, after I was able to get past that huge period of self-doubt I was able to think about things more clearly. I was very productive, mapping out a beginning the writing process for an Interracial BDSM story 😉. Started the day out on the right foot, worked through a really crappy event with a Dom & able to see it from an outsider’s perspective. Then said Dom was kind enough to use orgasm control in a manner that left me with a high/bliss like feeling….Thank You 😉.Image

Day 1 of My 30 Days of Kink

This is my original day post for the 30 days of kink

A Pansexual Babygirl Submissive Living in a Vanilla World

Day 1: Dom, sub, switch?  What parts of BDSM interest you?  Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.

I am a sexual submissive, my non-sex life is a different story. I don’t know what it is but, a guy telling me to suck his cock, or that  I’m not all owed to cum is one of the most arousing situations I can think of….except for maybe me and another sub (sex doesn’t matter) both working on a Dom or following his commands, mmmmm!
I would be lying if I said the only part about BDSM that I found intriguing was the sexual aspect, it’s not. I love the idea of having a Dom who knows me well enough, that he can tell when I’m emotional overwhelmed or shutting off my emotions altogether. I want a Dom that…

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Day 1of the 30 Days of Kink

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Day 1: Dom, sub, switch? What parts of BDSM interest you? Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.
I would have to say that I am most comfortable in the sub category, more specifically a babygirl. In the past, I have acted as a switch & with the right person it can be a real turn on! Unfortunately, with the wrong person it can be a total turnoff for me. I have had people approach me because they wanted me to give them the stereotypical, aggressive, black Domme experience. I was so uncomfortable, I couldn’t enjoy the experience at all.
***I have answered this question a little over a year ago, and am going to post that here as well.***
I am obviously interested in the Daddy/babygirl relationship, as I’m currently in that type of relationship, and have found it to be the D/s type of relationship that creates the biggest: Omg!!! This is totally what I need, response. It’s also the type of relationship where I feel the most cared about. Initially, the idea of a Daddy/babygirl relationship kinda freaked me out, but that’s because I didn’t truly understand what it was.
Honestly, when I first saw the term I had the feeling that I get when I happen to land on an episode of Dateline: To Catch A Predator. I was waiting to get an offer for Mike’s Hard Lemonade. Boy, was I a judgmental prude! I was sent a message that was from the Dom perspective, and it described the responsibilities that a Daddy/babygirl have towards one another. I totally felt like the message was my idea of what D/s should be like, for me. Then I noticed that the message was written by a Daddy Dom. We tested my response to him using the term Daddy. I’ll just say, I knew instantly it was a very good thing for me to use that term. I can’t say what changed, but from that moment on, I realized that I was a babygirl. I knew I couldn’t be a slave, I’d tried that in the past & it was not a good fit.

I never really thought about it in-depth, but I think that Daddy Doms in generally are more nurturing. I know that Daddy is there for me anytime that I need him. He provides me with the emotional support that I need. He not only tells me he loves me, but he demonstrates it as well.
I guess to me BDSM means: that the relationship has a large amount of trust & communication between the partners, it also has a lot of kink….come on, you had to know that was going to be part of my description. BDSM means that my partner is going to be more open to knew experiences. It means there are going to be times when my snarky/bratty side comes out, and that he may need to punish me. This lifestyle means:my partner & I are free to explore any fantasies that come to the forefront .. I love the way things are going so far….

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Daddy’s Girl

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If you’re like me, the first time you heard of a Daddy Dom /babygirl relationship you thought it was weird. In honesty, wasn’t exactly very open minded when it was mentioned. Then I received a message that described how a Daddy viewed his responsibilities to his babygirl, and suddenly it didn’t seem like such a bad thing.
I can’t speak for every D/s couple in a DD/bg relationship, but I know that I’ve never felt more loved & cherished than I feel now. It’s amazing to know that to my Daddy, I am one of the most important things in his life. I realize that he has other obligations & responsibilities in his life, but I also know when he asks how I am, it’s because it really is important to him. If I’m having a rough day, just talking to him makes it all better. He eases my fears & doubts; he’s supportive & cares about things that interest me.
Tonight, I was telling him how my daughter & I are really similar, except she likes to be the center of attention. Then I started laughing and said maybe I’m like that a little, too. Daddy agreed. As we talked, I realized that I don’t want to be the center of attention all of the time, but I do appreciate it when I am. I normally go without things because my kids come first, ALWAYS….but when Daddy calls me His babygirl, I feel like the most important person in the world.

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