Day 1 of My 30 Days of Kink

Anal Beads

Anal Beads (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Day 1: Dom, sub, switch?  What parts of BDSM interest you?  Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.

I am a sexual submissive, my non-sex life is a different story. I don’t know what it is but, a guy telling me to suck his cock, or that  I’m not all owed to cum is one of the most arousing situations I can think of….except for maybe me and another sub (sex doesn’t matter) both working on a Dom or following his commands, mmmmm!
I would be lying if I said the only part about BDSM that I found intriguing was the sexual aspect, it’s not. I love the idea of having a Dom who knows me well enough, that he can tell when I’m emotional overwhelmed or shutting off my emotions altogether. I want a Dom that will give me the pain that I need to feel in order to actually feel my emotions, then I want him to fuck me hard, wrap me up and hold me when we’re done….is that too much for a girl  to ask for?
I need a Dom that helps me stay focused and gives me tasks to do for him throughout the day. I also need the reassurance and care that a Dom provides. I don’t think most people iin the vanilla world realize the amount of communication and attention that is required to maintain a Dom/sub relationship; perhaps, there is a part of me that needs a higher level of attention and care in order for me to feel safe and valued.
I haven’t had enough experience with women sexually to know if my feelings about having a Domme are the same as those I have towards a Dom. Personally, all of the Dommes that I’ve talked to so far have been pretty bitchy. I don’t want or need that, I can be a bitch on my own.  I guess another part of having a Dom that attracts me is having someone strong enough to make the decisions, so I don’t always have to make them. Don’t get me wrong, I DO NOT EVER WANT TO BE A SLAVE!!!!! I don’t think that there’s any chance that I would be able to have a succesful relationship, if I weren’t even allowed to express my ideas and opinoins.
Oh yeah, did I mention that the idea of sucking my Dom’s cock while I have my hands playing with his balls, is intoxicating. I love the idea of having anal beads up my ass while having my Dom spank me, but him not allowing me to  cum until he gives me permission. I get wet just thinking about my Dom attaching a remote control butterfly to my clit, or having me insert Ben Wa balls while I work…..and me begging him to fuck me! I didn’t want you to think that the sex isn’t a part of it, it is such a yummy part of it.
Well that’s the end of my 1st day of kink; feel free to tell me what you think ;).